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Q:My 25yr old daughter hangs up the phone on me when we are talking about situations that I don’t have control over when I ask what she wants me to do about it. I’m not one to ignore this kind of thing since I feel disrespected and don’t deserve to be treated like “whatever”. What should I do?
A:Thanks so much for calling to talk about this. I can imagine your frustration here. If your daughter is really looking for you to fix a situation that is out of your control, maybe she would be open to you talking her through some suggestions on how she can handle it. That way you’re giving your input, which she clearly wants, but you’re allowing her to learn how to handle difficult situations that she’d rather stay away from. You also may want to remind her again that hanging up on you isn’t acceptable, and you’d like to have a mature conversation with her. Clearly, this is very important to her, and you want to be there to help her, but you can’t help her when she isn’t ready to have the back and forth conversation.
For help with parenting questions, call the National Parent Helpline® at 1.855.4A PARENT (1.855.427.2736) or visit www.nationalparenthelpline.org.
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It is very important to support your children and encourage them to try new things, especially in school because as long as they are involved in school they are not involved in the streets. My daughter was thinking about being the yearbook president but was afraid that she was not going to be given that opportunity and she also thought no one would pick her for president. We’ve always encouraged our kids to try new things, so we encouraged her to follow her interests and run for yearbook president. We praised her excitement and her courage to try something new, and said that no matter the outcome, she’ll be able to look back and know that she tried. News that she became the 8th grade president of the year book committee surprised her and made her really happy. She reported that she has accomplished something big for herself and that the encouragement she received from her family makes her want to run for class president once she reaches high school.
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The week of the National Parent Helpline Park event my eyes were really opened up as I asked myself what am I really doing for my son? Let me tell you about how this day went for me and my son. It was a great sunny day, it was very hot out at the Park in Pomona and all the children were there with their parents having a good time. I watched parents laughing and enjoying the day as the family did fun activities together. I on the other hand was volunteering on one side of the park while my son helped on the other side of the park with a fun game booth. I do have to admit I was happy to see my son smile and enjoy himself outside around other people. My son does not like leaving the house and would prefer staying home playing video games. At the end of the day I realized the importance of bonding and how it is very important to spend quality time with your children. Spending time together is more important than taking your son to Magic Mountain or Disney Land. It does not matter how much money you spend on your children but, the amount of time you spend with your children is what’s important. When you spend time with your children you get to know your child and know how he or she is doing in school. At the end of the day when driving home my son thanked me for taking him to the park event as he said he had a lot of fun and got to interact with other children as well as know a little of what his dad does.
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